Mom’s on a Mission…

I am so excited to read this book. My mother brought it to me last week and I’ve been dying to open it and explore the world of Zack. But, with it being such an easy read, I figured it would be best to read it during our 5.5 hour drive to my husband’s family holiday party next week. My husband wants me to read it aloud during our trip because he wants to learn about Zack too but has no desire to ever open a book.

Which brings me to my next thought… Does falling somewhere along the spectrum run in families? Throughout my son’s baby years, we always compared him to his dad. “He is just like his father used to be” was a common phrase from my mother-in-law in the beginning. My husband was very socially awkward until we met and I dragged him from his shell of antisocial-people-hating. He also avoids anything remotely similar to confrontation (including eye contact) and he is unable to concentrate on something for very long unless it’s one of the few things he’s EXTREMELY interested in. He’s brilliant though and if he IS interested, he knows everything about it. And, as much as I love my stubborn husband, he can be extremely condescending if you disagree with him. I don’t know. It’s just a thought that has entered my mind and I’m almost positive it has to enter every parent’s mind at some point or another when they discover that their little one has autism. Did it come from the family? Hm.

This thought process led my husband to me too. I get irritated extremely quickly. I cannot just tune noise out like most people. If a bird is outside singing, I’m going to scream at it to shut up. If my husband turns the TV volume up above 17, I’m frustrated. I cannot stand our surround sound and the car radio does not need to be louder than audible unless it’s Nickelback or Billy Joel. I also have a bubble around me and Heaven help most people if they cross my bubble walls and touch me. “Don’t hang on me,” is a favorite phrase I use to everyone except my children. My husband has been permitted to cross my bubble walls as well but I will still only tolerate it for so long. I am also cold easily and if a breeze touches my skin I am going to put a sweatshirt on and shiver. I don’t care if the Vegas weather reaches 115, I will wear a sweater if there is a breeze. My husband thinks I have Sensory Integration Dysfunction. I think he has Asperger’s.

Is this line of thought common in parents of autiebabes or are we just nuts?

As I sit at the table with my 3-year-old and a pile of colorful bears, I start to wonder what other 3-year-olds are capable of. Is my son able to do more when it comes to intellect and skills? Is he doing less? I know that one should never compare their child with any others, but when you spend 24 hours every day wondering just what you should be teaching your child, you tend to think in terms of comparisons. Is his counting up to par or should we work more on it? Colors? Drawn circles? Should we spend less time playing matching games and more time stacking cups? Or, should we forget table time all together and concentrate on larger motor skills at the playground?

Boy, I wish children came with manuals…

The diet is going fabulously! We’ve had no known accidental gluten or casein moments and while Zack is still a little ball of energy, his behavior has settled in the anger and frustration department. He is very outgoing right now and will talk to anyone and expect a response immediately. If there is no response, he will repeat himself until he feels heard. He is also counting, but he refuses to say the number six. Six is evil and ignored. Even if I correct him, he will skip it again. Six must die. Someday, when his language excedes the current level of “cookie” and “poople” I will ask him. “Zack, why don’t you like the number six?”

I bet he has a reason. Zack always has a reason.

It comes naturally to me. If I feel my son needs speaking up for, you bet your ass my mouth will open. My husband avoids confrontation, which is probably why he married me. Opposites attract and all that. Lately, confrontation has been my head title and middle name.

I am extremely stressed out with Zack’s school. His teacher avoids me unless she has really good news. Yesterday, I decided that Zack will not ride his bus anymore and I will be picking him up. I went to the school and his teacher told me “Zack put on his own jacket today!” and then disappeared and I didn’t see her during the rest of my stay at the school. Instead, I spoke with the TA and she agreed that the preschool teacher is overwhelmed and doesn’t know what to do with my son. So, it’s agreed then… Zack does not belong in that woman’s classroom.

With that knowledge, I refuse to sit by and “wait until March for the psychologist to evaluate him.” I have set up a meeting with the principal, called the language pathologist from the other school for recommendation, had our pediatrician send a referal for immediate evaluation to the school, and spoke with the neuropsychologist’s assistant about them sending a referal as well. When I get in to see the principal, I have notes on what is and isn’t helping my son in the preschool program. I am listing the class as “inappropriate for a child with special needs” and requesting an immediate transfer to the full-time class for autism at the other school. I know the teacher in that class and I TRUST her. She’s been on both sides of the table… She teaches children with autism and she has a child on the spectrum herself. That makes all the difference!